SoundNexx

WHY IS THIS DUDE STILL TRAPPED??

Yes, you read it right! Talk about beating a dead one legged zebra!! Damn, has R. Kelly finally lost his creative edge in 2007? I don’t know about ya’ll, but I miss the old R. Kelly from the days of Public Announcement. That version of R. Kelly was actually a SINGER! When you talk about his albums like Born Into The 90s, 12 Play and R. Kelly were classics in my book. That was Robert in his music prime. After those joints came the R. double album in 1998, which was a decent release as well. I think he could have just removed a few of the filler tracks and made one solid album though, but that’s just my opinion. After that album the R. Kelly movement was hit and miss with me. I wasn’t really feeling the R&B thug persona that he started to embellish on that TP-2 album. It seemed like singing became secondary to his newfound rapper vibe. I mean Kels had briefly rapped on some of his previous projects, but this was different. This was just the beginning of what he had in store for his fans. I can’t front though R. Kelly is the master at making catchy hit records, but his albums as of late have been mediocre at best except for that Chocolate Factory album he dropped in 2003. Everybody on the planet has stepped in the name of love with the keys in the ignition, so I have to give props when they’re due. We won’t even talk about how R. Kelly went all gospel on us right after those tapes of him and the young girls got leaked all over the internet. He still holds the championship for the best lie ever told by a singer caught on tape doing wrong though.

Then in 2005 it happened. R. Kelly trapped us all in the phucken closet! I still remember the first time I heard Chapter 1 of 5 on the radio and discussing it with folks at work that day. When I realized that this was a crazy story broken up into five chapters, admittedly I was intrigued. Like everyone else with a conscious, I couldn’t wait to hear the next chapters, so I found a spot online where I could hear them before they actually played on the radio. I knew that the songs would have no replay value once the five chapters had been revealed, but the musical concept was brilliant. R. Kelly was definitely the man again, but unfortunately he f*cked that up by making an extra seven wack chapters. It definitely seemed like an unplanned afterthought, which backfired horribly. I was confused as hell by Chapter 9, and all I really remember is something about a midget, a fat white woman and a donkey with wearing some cowboy boots? I didn’t even bother watching chapter 10 thru 12. I was just glad that the closet madness was finally over; at least I thought it was dammit?

I almost spit my pickle-prune juice with rum cocktail all over my television when I saw the commercial for the release of Chapters 13-22 of the Trapped In The Closet travesty. How could he? Why would he? Honestly, does anybody really give a damn about this story or the characters involved? I don’t and I am disappointed that R. Kelly would bother releasing any more chapters on this tired story. Almost everyone that I talked to hated his last album, so maybe this is his last hoorah before he finally goes to jail? On second thought, since he last name isn't Vick, he may not see any jail time at all? His trial starts in September, but does anybody really remember what he was being prosecuted for in 2007? Those child porn videos are so old now, they're in black & white...

On that note…I can’t leave my visitors hanging who are actually interested in the next 10 Chapters, so I have decided to post Chapter 13 just in case you haven’t seen it yet. Don’t hold your breath if you think I will be posting any of the other chapters on this blog though...

Trapped In The Closet - Chapter 13

Was this video really worth your precious eye juice?